20 Lessons From 2020: Life, Manifestation, Failure & More

We can all agree that 2020 has been a year full of ups, downs, positives, negatives, loss, love, life, and more. It hasn’t exactly been the easiest for myself either but everyday you have the chance to live a new day and change anything you want, whenever you want because you are in complete control of your life. After experiencing a series of these events through the year, I have learned 20 different lessons that I’d like to share. Of course not everything can go into a full and depth detail, but I will give quick summaries of what I felt really shaped me into the person I have become within this year.

With 2021 now approaching within a few weeks, take time after this post to reflect on what you have learned this year whether it is good or bad, and comment it here or tag us on our official Instagram @glamourandguide. Let us know if there is something in this post that you really resonate with as well! Remember to always go after what you want, you can start over every morning, and if you don’t go forward to try in life, you will always stay in the same place you are right now.

1. Life

Life has changed drastically this year and although in the beginning of the quarantine I did really struggle, I learned one important thing: life is not promised for any of us and it is short. We all should live our lives everyday like it is our last and just be happy. This does not mean go and do anything which can cause you to be in danger, but more of a “be the vest version of yourself” and let life lead or guide you. I struggled with finding the meaning of our lives and why we wake up everyday and do things which may be pointless if we are going to be gone one day, but that taught me and motivated me to want to live more everyday and forget about the small dumb things which make me sad in the moment.

2. Love

Not just with a significant other, but loving others more this year and really taking time to be let close ones know that I love them, care for them, and am always thinking of them. In my personal relationship, this year made me extremely grateful of the person that I have been with for the past two and a half years, and all the memories and adventures we have made. I am truly so excited for the future and what there is to come for both of us not just within the relationship, but our careers, and personal lives.

3. Loss

Experiencing the first loss within my family of someone who I was very close with was definitely one of the hardest things that has happened this year. I still think about this person every single day and how they’re doing, how much I miss them, and just knowing that the pain they were experiencing on this Earth is no longer happening to them, makes me feel a bit better. Dealing with grief and loss is not an easy thing and can take months even years to finally cope with, but even though life does go on, I miss this person so much and can’t wait one day to be reunited and see them.

4. Manifestation

Although I am not currently manifesting anymore, I did manifest for the past 2 years and it was a really fun experience. I even had a manifesting journal in which everyday I would write stuff I was grateful for, what I was looking forward to next in receiving, and things I had already received which I did manifest in my journal. I also meditated a lot over the summer which helped with an anxiety I had before I would go to sleep. Currently I am not manifesting due to personal reasons which is possibly for another blog post, but I do still think that things I would write down or ask the Universe for did happen and I am so grateful for these things that did happen to me. One thing which manifestation did teach me was to just not be so worried about my next step in life and where I’d be headed, but to just relax and let life lead me. I became less worried about what others thought of me and my anxiety did get better.

5. Maturity

The person I was a year ago is someone who I sometimes don’t even recognize because of all the childish things I used to do in high school. I do give myself a pass because I was in high school and was still learning, growing, and trying to find who I was, but I did completely change my mindset in so many different aspects. I outgrew many people and certain situations in life which I am grateful for because everything has a learning lesson. I matured mentally in terms of where I want to go and what I want to do with my life, as well as caring less if someone speaks a comment about me or about what I post on social media which makes me happy.

6. Style

My style did a complete 360 this year which I am so happy about!! I really invested in myself with a couple of shoes, jackets, tops, jeans, and more! It was a little pricey but when you look good you seriously feel good. I definitely got more out of my comfort zone and styled up pieces which I would be too shy or afraid to wear but now I love my wardrobe and can’t wait to see how my summer style will be. You also don’t need to spend hundreds on clothes and can also buy second-hand or thrifted too!

7. Friendship

While I did mature this year, I also did lose many friendships and lost the touch or closeness I used to have with many. In high school, you make a lot of friends and unfortunately some of them don’t make it with you to college and if they do then that’s great! But for me, I actually made the chose to stop some friendships before and after college reached just for the sake of myself. I really don’t value wasting time anymore in something which just isn’t meant for you, and this includes friendships. It is sad when you do stop talking to people whether they’re from your childhood, or someone close you met in high school, but putting yourself first and thinking are some of these friendships even worth it, is the best thing you can do for yourself. After doing this and going through these with people, I did realize a huge weight lifted off my shoulder and not as much anxiety when it comes to forcing yourself to staying in contact or checking up on people who wouldn’t do the same for you.

8. Less Doubt

A year ago, I would’ve never thought that I could have even started a blog and accomplish as much as I did today, or even be going to fashion school right now! The confidence as well which I have right now wouldn’t even be possible if it weren’t for getting rid of the self-doubt I used to have. Th dreams, goals, and aspirations which I gave myself this year have truly happened and I have so much more to check off the list within the next few years. When you doubt yourself, not only does it harm your mentality, but it really makes you think that you can’t accomplish these things that sound crazy but it only sounds crazy because you haven’t even tried figuring out the steps on how to do these things. “The plan is to move. Move out. Move on. Move up. Move smarter.” – The Female Hustlers

9. Failure

My senior year of high school I started a blog very similar to the one I have right now and unfortunately it didn’t kick off like the one I have right now and am writing this post on. This was definitely one of my failures because not only did I not invest a lot of time into it, but I made myself believe that I wasn’t going to get anywhere just because I didn’t already have a large platform of people following me or a loyal audience. Of course after getting rid of self-doubt and adding a sprinkle of confidence, I was able to get out of this shell I was hiding in and put in the work for almost two and a half months to get my blog as amazing as it is right now. I got feedback from peers and adults, worked hard on putting together blog posts, fixing up an Instagram, having social media platforms updated, and more!

10. Success

The connections I have made, people I have talked to, and work I have done would have not been entirely possible if it weren’t for my blog. Success is your own definition of what you want it to be. It can be a million dollars in your bank account, or even a couple hundreds, but no matter what, you make it your own. My success of having the opportunity to talk to many people in the industry, be featured on a podcast about my blogging journey, have H&M featured me on their website and app, working with several brands and receive products for content, and more is all the small pieces of my own success which I am so happy and grateful for. This keeps me going for even more that will be achieve in the future and I am ready for it.

11. Positivity

I used to look down on myself and compare myself a lot and this was partially because of social media. What you see on Instagram is only the highlight reel of someone else’s life and it isn’t entirely true. People get mentally ruined from all this and it seriously can damage the way you see life. I would compare my days to someone who lived a completely different life than me and think why can’t that be me or why couldn’t I be born rich and famous? But after experiencing so much from this year, I learned that this is where I’m meant to be and my time is going to come. Everyone receives their success and what is meant for them, at certain times in life and right now, I am glad where I am. I learned about positivity, learning to give myself more kind words everyday when I am feeling down, and just not be as hard or compare to what you see on the internet.

12. Self-Care

I never really did much self-care until this year and invested in myself as mentioned before by splurging on a new wardrobe, learning to love myself, spend more time alone, and focus on the good or what there is next to come. Self-care isn’t just buying yourself a Chanel bag, or dropping $400 on Sephora skincare, and a Cartier bracelet. You don’t need to do all these things for showing yourself you are worthy of it. Of course if you can afford it then no one is stopping you, but if you want to really show yourself self-care, invest in things which will make you a stronger and better person mentally, physically, and emotionally. At the end of the day, we do really just have ourselves and focusing on how we can improve everyday or take more time to just relax and not be so hard on ourselves, is the most luxurious you can do.

13. Determination

I have never been more determined to do anything in my life than I have been this year. Starting my blog, turning into a content creator, and living for myself is something I can’t be more grateful for. When I put my mind to something and I envision this crazy idea in my head of something I really want to do, I will figure out the step by step of how I can accomplish this because I really believe that one day I can do it! One day everything you ever dreamed of will happen and come true and all the hard work you did in your life will pay off. We all deserve so much more and if there is something in your life right now that you want to improve, don’t want until later to fix or act upon it because you never know if doing it later will be too late. I learned that if you really want something, start now and the results will pay off.

14. Owning Up

Going back to friendships I have lost, people I have gained in my life, and confidence I have grown, I learned that I don’t owe anything anything and I don’t need to do anything I don’t want to. It may sound or come off as rude and mean, but if you don’t want to send a text back, or be part of drama and gossip, you don’t need to! Owning up to whatever you want to do and realizing that you don’t owe anybody your time or energy is the best thing!! You feel so free especially knowing that there is another thing you need to waste time on that can be used towards something else. I haven’t heard or been apart of any kind of high school related drama in such a long time and it feels so great knowing that! A lot of people like to be apart of it or stir something up with others and it can even be you such as rude comments or talking behind your back, but you’re the best and happiest when you just live your life and not care as much what others think of you.

15. Goals

I learned in 2020 that nothing is impossible. The person and version of yourself that you want to be is possible no matter what anyone else says. I have a piece of paper from earlier this year with all the goals I wanted to accomplish and it is so crazy to say that I can check all of them off. I learned that when you really put your mind to something and decide that this is what you want to do, no matter how big or how small it is, you seriously can do it. Let go of anything negative people or your mind tell you and write down what you want to do or accomplish. Life is seriously crazy and in a good way! You never know tomorrow when you wake up that your life can change in an instant. Goals also keep you striving for achieving something new and gives you the motivation to go even higher and do more!

16. Self-Love

Confidence, being shy, and not really investing into myself is something I struggled with almost all of my life up until recently. I was not the most confidence girl in a room and after so many years of going through this, I feel that now I am finally at a point where I am extremely comfortable with everything I do whether it’s with what I wear, how I speak, or what I post on social media. I do have my moments here and there where I am shy of course, but compared to who and how I was a year or even two years ago, I am proud of who I’ve become. Investing into looking good, and how you feel about yourself is one of the most important things you can do for yourself because is the body and mind we are given for the rest of our lives and it is up to us how and what we want to do with it.

17. Career

Since my senior year of high school, as soon as I submitted my college application, I knew that I needed to do more. But in what sense? I didn’t have a resume, a LinkedIn profile, or anything that would prove I was serious about what I wanted to do in the future. I knew fashion and business was my true passion but I was doing nothing with my life at the moment to even take that first step into the industry. I watched hours worth of YouTube videos about how to find internships in your dream job, how to get your dream job, how to make money and be rich, and a bunch of other videos that were to help me start. I did my first remote internship in January of 2020 and by the end of the year as it’s now December, I have completed 5 remote internships, and am currently in my first retail luxury job.

I was able to accomplish all of these things and more because I realized that why should I wait until I graduate college to start my career and my life when I can just start now. The earlier and the sooner you do the better because you can build up on your education with what you don’t know, try a couple of things such as starting a blog like me, and then investing time into internships especially being remote right now due to the pandemic. I have a lot of goals for myself with my career and I am excited to see where I will be a year from now all because I took the first step for my career my senior year of high school.

18. Journaling

Journaling is such a fun activity which I wish I would’ve found sooner because it really teaches you to about gratefulness and mindfulness. I used to journal very heavily throughout the quarantine but stopped as of recently due to an extremely busy schedule and just life in general. If you haven’t done it, I really encourage you to because it helps get your mind off of so much. You can also have a lot of fun with it and buy a journal and some colorful pens too!

19. Religion

(Disclaimer: This will be about my religion so if you would not like to read, then skip ahead to #20.) When I was younger, I used to go to Church almost every Sunday with my Grandparents and being so young, I didn’t really understand the point of going, reading the Bible, or even why we had to pray to God. I did pray every night with my Mom and while my family started to have some issues and my parents separated and life did get a bit more difficult, I found myself not being as in touch with God. When I got to high school, I continued to still pray every night and during the quarantine from this year, when I was really struggling and at one of the lowest points I had ever been at, I wondered everyday what was missing? Why was I so unhappy? Yes I was grateful for my health and people around me still being safe from the virus, but even though we were stuck inside the house for so many months, I really wondered when was life going to back to normal and had a really bad existential crisis and developed a severe anxiety where I was even afraid to sleep at night and waited until almost 5 in the morning until I would see light out so I can have the comfort of knowing I can sleep peacefully now since there is no more darkness. I struggled with this for many months and I thought manifestation was the key but then I realized it had to be God.

I watched several videos on Youtube, and even read articles trying to figure out how to get rid of this existential crisis and life anxiety I had. I wondered why was life given to us if we would be gone one day? Why did we need to do this everyday? A couple of months after when I experienced the loss in my family which was to someone extremely close to me, this person was so invested in God and the relationship she had with him and knew that if she were to be gone from this Earth, she’d be in a better place because she’d be with the person who helped bring all of us here too! I struggled with knowing that she would probably be gone soon and I wanted to develop a relationship with God so that I can not only have less anxiety about everything I was going through in my life, but having the peace knowing that I can pray everyday to my lost loved one and that she’ll be okay and know I am here thinking about her. I purchased my first Bible a couple of months ago and a prayer journal with scriptures and devotionals to truly help me connect on a spiritual level with God and I have never felt better. Some people aren’t as deeply invested into their religion or religion in general and there is nothing wrong with that because everyone has their own style with how it comes to spirituality and what they believe in. I never judge anyone and what they want to believe in or how they go about their spirituality and I know that everyone has their own ways of finding peace and happiness. This was one of the ways that I found peace and happiness through my relationship with God!

20. Myself

2020 gave me the biggest lesson and it was learning about myself! I grew so much as a person, became so much more grateful for what is all around me including my friendships, family, and relationship. I am studying at my dream school (FIT), I have collaborated with brands and did my first paid partnership, I focused less on what I don’t have and more on what is coming and what I have that I should be appreciative about which some people don’t have such as a roof over my head, food on my table, and loving arms from those who are in my life. I also grew so much more out of my comfort zone and discovered my style which really boosted my confidence as well. I have my first job in the luxury fashion retail industry, I learned to spend time alone, created a deeper relationship with God, and I learned to love myself so much more! Life is a journey and it is so amazing to know what there is to come next whether it’s tomorrow, a week, next month, or even a year from now!

Thank you so much for reading! 
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Author: Pamela Valdez

Content Writer Intern for She's SINGLE Magazine, Social Media Marketing Intern, and PR Editorial Intern for Access by NKC. Pursuing fashion industry and will be an upcoming undergraduate at FIT.